BEER WARNING LABELS   Due to increasing products liability litigation, beer manufacturers have accepted the FDA's suggestion that the following warning labels be placed immediately on all beer containers.   WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may make you think you are whispering when you are not.   WARNING: CONSUMPTION of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like an asshole.   WARNING: CONSUMPTION of alcohol may cause you to tell the same boring story ove …

1. You've gotta 'introduce' yourself to Mr. Penis, i.e., 'Hi! I'm Shirley! Nice to meet ya, big guy!'. Don't dive on him like he's a raw piece of meat and you're a starving pitbull! Be gentle. Stroke him nice and easy. Make friends first. 2. When (Not 'IF') giving oral sex, don't suck so hard that you make an industrial vacuum cleaner appear as a dust buster and suck the man's eyeballs out of his sockets. Mr. Penis is a sensitive 'guy'. Be gentle. Cont …

Technical Support NeededDesperately seeking technical support: I'm currently running the latest version of Girlfriend and havingsome problems. I've heen running the same version of DrinkingBuddies 1.0 all along as my primaryapplication, and all the Girlfriend releases have always conflicted with it.I hear the DrinkingBuddies won't crash if you run Girlfriend in background mode with the sound switchedoff. But I'm embarrassed to say that I can't find the …

Of course I love ya darling your a bloody top notch bird and when I say ur gorgeous I mean every single word   So ya bum is on the big side I dont mind a bit of flab it means that when I'm ready there's somethin there to grab   So your belly isn't flat no more I tell ya, I dont care so long as when I cuddle ya I can get my arms around there   No sheila who is your age has nice round perky breasts they just gave into gravity but I know ya did ya best   …